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How to Tell if Someone Is Being Mean to You

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How to Tell if Someone Is Being Mean to You Empty How to Tell if Someone Is Being Mean to You

Post by doctor no Sat Jan 22, 2011 1:35 am

How to Tell if Someone Is Being Mean to You



Think someone's being mean to you, but are not sure? Think they're up
to something or secretly despise you? Whether it's friends, family or
people you don't even know, here's how to tell if someone is being mean
to you



Steps



Note the way they act around you and think about it.
If you think about what they're doing, it may give you a better idea of
what their motive is; sometimes people are unintentionally hurtful or
have some other reason for saying hurtful things without meaning to be
mean. Things that could be taken as being mean could include: gossiping about you to others, ignoring
you, saying hurtful things to you, breaking or stealing your stuff,
belittling you. Whatever the act, there is always an underlying cause
which is good to understand before you take action against the person.








  • Could it just be your imagination? If you're having a bad day,
    people seem angrier and meaner than they would on a day in which you
    were happy; this is just the way your mind works.
  • Could they have a crush
    on you? Sometimes a person can try to gain your attention by being mean
    or insulting you. Not all people do this and if a person is seemingly being mean to you, it doesn't mean they have a crush on you.
  • Could they be trying to teach you a lesson? Often young people, or
    even older people, take the advice or tough love from friends and
    family as remarks that are meant to hurt you. This is not always the
    case, and people who love you could just be trying to help.
  • Could they be jealous?
    Do they say things to put you down or build themselves up? This is made
    to make themselves seem better than you and is more a statement on what
    they think of themselves than what they think of you.
  • Could you have accidentally insulted them? Without knowing you may
    have actually insulted them first. This is especially common among
    friends who don't want to upset each other; they may not want to
    confront you about what you said, so take out their anger by being mean.
  • Could they have troubles of their own? People who are unsure of how
    to reach out to others may take out their frustrations with anger -
    making other people feel bad seems like a convenient way to make
    yourself feel good, but it's at the expense of the other person. Stress
    is a big cause of people being mean - someone may snap at you for no
    reason other than that they're feeling stressed. It's important to
    recognise when someone's simply venting their emotions and actually
    intending to be mean to you. Again, this isn't so much a statement
    about you, but of how they feel about themselves.
  • Could they just dislike you? This is probably a result of a number
    of the reasons given above (Having personal issues or being jealous of
    you), but in many cases, people who are being mean to you don't do it
    because you've done something to hurt them

----


Ask others. Get the opinions of others, especially
your parents and friends, so you can decide what to do next or why this
person is doing this. Never ask advice of friends that may dislike the
person you're asking them about; they'll only paint the person in a
negative light, possibly in order to make you have a fight with this
person even if they aren't being intentionally mean to you; the best
people to ask are your parents or family, unless they're the ones you
feel are being mean to you



----


Confront the person if you know them; if they're a
stranger, never tackle this alone - always talk to them with a friend
or parent
. It's important that you complete steps one and two
before confronting a person as they may have unintentionally been mean
to you and you may make them feel angry or stupid if you accuse them of
being mean without thinking of why they did it - there's nothing better
to cause problems if you accuse someone of being mean when you imagined
it or they were only venting! Express to the person how you felt and
discuss the issues with them if they want. Stay calm and don't demand
an apology or recite what they said word-for-word; just ask that they
be more mindful of your feelings. If the person doesn't have an answer,
give them time to come to you - the ball's in their court now and they
can either continue in theirs ways or stop. If they continue, you know
that you've told them how much it hurts you and that they're doing this
on purpose now



----


Avoid contact with the person if the behaviour continues, either because they do
actually hate you (Which is nothing to do with you, but more to do with
them) or if they refused to stop being mean to you; you don't have to
put up with someone trying to make you feel bad


-----


Move on. There's no point in dwelling in the past;
you did all you could to reconcile with the person and to stop them
being mean to you. If the behavior continues or escalates, tell a
teacher, family member or adult immediately - the person may have
developed a vendetta against you



----


Tips



  • Although it's always good to try and find out why exactly someone
    is being mean to you, you often may never know; however, you may have a
    gut feeling if someone's being mean to you and you don't have to stand
    for it. Stick up for yourself if it's intended to hurt you.






  • Never try and be mean back; this ruins relationships, escalates
    arguments and can result in dangerous behaviour. There's no point in
    stooping to their level.



----


Warnings



  • Do not spread gossip about the situation, this will only make it worse






http://www.wikihow.com/Tell-if-Someone-Is-Being-Mean-to-You
doctor no
doctor no

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How to Tell if Someone Is Being Mean to You Empty Re: How to Tell if Someone Is Being Mean to You

Post by discovery Sat Jan 22, 2011 3:26 am

thanx a lot
discovery
discovery

الجنس : Male

عدد المساهمات : 1005
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تاريخ التسجيل : 2010-04-28

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